Beat Breakfast Panel: Do I hold more value on this friendship than my friend does?

Ok so a woman I have been friends with for over 20 years, and have always considered one of my best friends, is getting married this August. I’m very excited for her and happy for her. I asked her when the wedding was so I could “save the date” and she was like “well it’s (names date) but we are really tight for numbers (as in don’t expect an invitation) but we will be having friends come after the dinner for drinks and the dance.

I get it that weddings are expensive and if you have a lot of family and all that. I recently eloped and didn’t have any family or friends there. The problem I am having is that I am being invited to all the showers. So I feel like I’m not included in the “wedding” but will then still have to give shower gifts and a wedding gift. Plus the bridal night out (which the hotel is $142 each, pole dancing class is $30, dinner and drinks are however much we choose as we pay for our own…) seems like a wedding I’m not really invited to is going to cost me $500 or more.

And when I sent out the announcements that I eloped she didn’t even email, call, send a card… should I just bow out because I feel like maybe I put more stock in this friendship than she does?

Anonymous

 

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