Beat Breakfast Panel:Follow Up Friday:Do I reach out so my children have a relationship with a grandparent?

We’re following up with Beat listeners to see how they made out after they sent in their questions to us – and you – for help.  Every Friday, it’s a Follow-Up Friday on the Beat Breakfast Panel.

Original Panel

For the next few months in each city here in the region, it will be Pride month. June 1st will be Kitchener’s Tri-Pride in Victoria Park.  Which brings up my problem. I came out of the closet 12 years ago. I identify as a trans woman. It was a very hard decision, but it was a good decision for me. After I came out of the closet I lost some very close friends and family which is the case for most people who choose to transition.

One of my parents was very homophobic. I expected to run into a lot of issues with them but when I heard their response was “She is still my child and I love her very much”  I was shocked. I saw a 180 degree change from them. I love the amount of support I got from them. (They passed away a few years ago)

The other parent I thought would support me did a 180 degree change the other way. I got zero support to the point of them even trying to damage my relationships with others.  I’ve not talked to them in 12 years. They have not come by and seen any of my kids even my youngest who is nine years old. They have never attempted to meet her. They will regularly meet with my other siblings, nephews and nieces.  My children hear about it all the time from their cousins. I talk and get along with a few of my siblings.

I don’t mind being called the rainbow sheep of the family.  My problem is my children are missing out on a grandparent because of how they feel about me. Do I reach out and try to make it so that my children have a relationship with a grandparent that’s homophobic or do I just let it be and continue with my life? – I don’t mind being called the rainbow sheep of the family


First off I would like to thank everyone for their positive comments and support.

I shared with a few close friends that the Beat Breakfast Panel was mine.   After talking over coffee with a few of them and reading all the messages, I decided it was probably best for me not to contact them. I don’t want to get my daughter’s hopes up or cause any drama. They still know where I live and none of information has changed, so they’re still able to contact me if they choose to do so.

I knew 12 years ago that I would lose close friends and family, but I’ve also learned over we can always adopt new family members aunts, uncles,  grandparents, dogs ,cats – whatever makes us happy. So if Laura wants to be a adopted grandparent you’re more than welcome too be part of our family .

The one thing I love about the LGBTQ community is we believe in the power of love and we love to show it. Big hugs and thank you. – I don’t mind being called the rainbow sheep of the family

p.s.-I hope to see everyone at Tri Pride

What do you think?  Give us a call at 519-571-BEAT, leave a message in the comments below, or on Facebook.  Do you have an issue, problem, conundrum, question, concern?  Email us at and we could be helping you out on the next Beat Breakfast Panel.

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