Beat Breakfast Panel: He STINKS, he knows he STINKS, and he LOVES IT

Hey Beat Breakfast,

My husband has taken on a new diet. He feels better, but he doesn’t smell better. He has always been the type of person to toot his horn, literally, and now, oh my goodness, it is the worst it’s ever been.

Not only is his flatulence loud, but sometimes it’s not. And you know what that means. The smell that comes from that man smells like the devil had an air freshener he didn’t want so he sent it back to earth and my husband is the one that received it.

He thinks it’s hilarious. He’s actually DELIGHTED he can smell like cream of broccoli soup and a deluxe pizza at the same time. There is no winning this war with him, he doesn’t care that it’s gross- I guess I’ve tolerated the loud ones so long there’s no changing that.

So I guess beat listeners, what I’m asking you is, how can I make this stop. What can I sneak into his food to send the devil’s air freshener back. What can I DO as a retaliation that will make him regret ever making me smell his back bacon ever again?

I love this man, but a lesson needs to be learned.

P-U, Cambridge


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